New Background

Can You Hear Me Now?

Sunday, March 19, 2006


Things that consume me:
My husband
Desire to fulfill my destiny
My thoughts
Creating art

Reading is probably one of my very favorite things in life. I love books. I have a temperament that requires me to immerse myself in God even in my reading. For me, whatever I spend my time on; whether it’s movies, music, art, reading, whatever…there is sometimes a subtle, sometimes NOT so subtle shifting of my mind, actions, mood towards these things.

I suppose it’s not ironic that I would ponder these things as we are doing a series at church on Worship, called “Consumed”. Some people can find balance and ‘dip’ their lives into many areas. Some people tend to fall into ‘bondage’ to the things they spend their time, money...their very lives on. I am one of those people. I can easily slip into patterns that are shifting my ultimate God-ordained destiny if I’m not mindful of what it is that I spend my time on. I can become so consumed by the things I am creating (crafts, writing, etc) that I lose track of everything else going on around me or in me.

This morning as I prepare my body, mind, heart for church; I am thinking about whether my life is worshipping God or something else. I am thinking about what it is I am CONSUMED by right now. A LIFESTYLE of Worship is what we are called to, not out of obedience, rather out of desire and love for God. My worship of GOD is authentic only in it’s reflection of the one who created me. My worship is the things I spend my time and life on.

I pray that God would reveal and remove the things and desire for things that are not in line with my desire for a lifestyle of worship. The revelation of the things I worship is usually pretty obvious. It’s the removal of these “things” that can feel like a scab being ripped from our skin. It is a covering, though not permanent, that hurts when removed. It has become a part of us, even if for only a short time. It covers the “real” person we are...or are created to be...beneath.

It’s not a pretty analogy but think about when you are wounded...better yet, think of your child. They might fall and get cut or scrape a knee or elbow…there is some dirt and debris that must be removed. The injury must be kissed (that’s part of the healing, at least in my experience). The wound must be covered and protected until healing begins, until the scab forms. Eventually the scab falls off to reveal new, tender skin beneath and sometimes a scar. This is part of the removal of the things in our life to reach the point of worship to God.

We are people; therefore, we become wounded at some point in our lives. We fall down and scrape our hearts or get cut by ourselves or others….there is dirt and debris in that wound (in the form of thoughts, behaviors and actions) that must be removed or it will infect us, possibly even kill us. We go to our Father who helps clean the wound. The Father will seek out and find the dirt and debris and help us clean it ALL out. He then holds us and kisses this ‘ouch-ie’ and applies a bandaid (sometimes even a pretty bandaid to help us forget the throbbing pain).

The healing is starting. Sometimes, like children, we remove the bandaid before it’s time and we pick at the scab (gross I know, but you see where this is going), the skin beneath is still very raw and bright pink, it’s very vulnerable to becoming reinjured. There are scars (reminders) as a result of this removal and healing.

In my life, as I question my worship to God, I wonder what God will reveal and remove. I know I will need a bandaid and I know God will provide a bandaid. I pray that the new skin beneath will be clean and uninfected. I pray that the desire to worship God will always overcome the desire to fulfill my flesh. I pray that God would remind me regularly, through the scars I’ve produced, what He brought me from and what He’s brought me to. I WANT to worship God not just on Sunday morning, but every minute of every day with every part of my life.

Have an awesome Sunday!


tam said...

I swear you're me.

I could only skim your post today cause it was too close to home and I have picked my scab.

I am sure of it your me someplace else.

Karen said...

Sometimes I think I really enjoy picking the scab. Like one of those really painful, welt-like zits that hurt to touch but you keep touching it over and over again, "yep, that hurts. ouch, that hurts. dang, that hurts". Sometimes I find it hard to let God clean it out. I really struggle with this sometimes.

kpjara said...

Speaking as someone who has the scars to show for it...I'm a total scab picker! Sounds like I'm not alone and actually in some very good company...Blessings to those of us who continue coming to the foot of the cross...scars and all! You all inspire me daily.