Okay, honestly it’s probably more likely sad truth #1,000,998 for me, but some of them didn’t sink in the 1st time and had to be repeated…a few thousand times…so do they really count?
A sad truth came over me today and I think I’d prefer to share it in the form of a story….so…here we go!
Once upon a time was a Y*O*U*N*G woman named KPJARA who loved to write. She found, through a dear pastor, a place on the computer, where she could write and capture, her own random thoughts intermingled with some insight and wisdom…for free (the writing space, not the wisdom…wisdom ALWAYS comes at a cost) AND she could possibly get some feedback from others on her attempts at humor and/or wisdom. She might even find answers to both solicited and unsolicited questions she kept hidden in her mind and heart or sometimes shared openly in this forum.
She started writing and wrote and wrote and wrote, every day for a month or so, until more than just the ‘expected’ visitors of spouse and pastor came to visit. She received ‘comments’ and encouragement from another writer. She realized she would have to start visiting other ‘spaces’ more openly and make some ‘friends’ in this blogdom if she wanted to connect with others. She de-lurked and started leaving random “comments” on a few sites and soon she realized she needed to just add “links” to these places she roamed daily, so she didn’t have to spend so much time finding them each day!
It was such a wonderful few months. She wrote and read and read and wrote and wrote some more. She told others of the freedom and release she had found through this venue and while her own goal of writing a book was ‘shelved’ as she completed this leg of her healing journey, she was certain she had never been more on track.
Her lackluster work life that had so drained her with boring days of idling, finally offered her freedom, in the form of time and a REALLY fast processor, with which she could produce more words to free the over packed memory banks of her mind. She found a creative outlet, where she could seek and find other writers, photographers and artists of all forms…all of which were so accomplished and free in their expressions.
It was an incredibly safe, yet challenging place to mingle. Some days other writers pushed her ‘buttons’ and forced her to think outside her own linear world. Some days she would do the same for others. It was a quid pro quo. It was a pseudo-utopic experience…until the day it began to collapse….
One day the comments wouldn’t load and she continued to get an error while trying to ‘talk’ to another writer. She felt imprisoned with words that wanted to flow and be free but were stopped abruptly and rudely by a MACHINE! She soon realized it wasn’t just her…it wasn’t her MACHINE…it was BLOGSPOT.COM! What had happened? Had they decided that with the ‘free services’ should come a user expectation of downtime unlimited?
The woman realized something else…she realized after the 3rd day of fighting tooth and nail with this ‘unknown entity’ that she had never chased after God with such a vengeance. She had never spent the time and energy to get to hear from God’s comments daily. She was sacrificing so much of her journey to BLOGSPOT.COM she had almost lost the very passion, the very source of the words she brought to this place.
The woman realized too, that this space had to be a result of her walk and talk with God, not the other way around. She realized the gift of writing was from God. She realized the gift of friendship was from God as well. She realized God was waiting patiently, at least for now, in the office, as her fingers found the comfortable tempo they had longed for.
Perhaps it was the ‘clog’ in her brain that had finally freed her to see this oversight. Perhaps it was the physical pull she was feeling towards the Word of God, perhaps it was a change she was seeing, though ever so slightly, that was affecting her daily mood and passion. Whatever the cause, she now knew she must refocus, redirect, reinitiate the extended quiet time she had so sacrificed for such a time.
She vowed to continue writing, but with less personal expectation and hopefully to result in more joy! She loved these people, and knew God had blessed her even amidst one of her most selfish ambitions. She knew that the enemy had also thwarted her writing progress by putting to side the actual book of encouragement she had desired to see completed in draft this year.
This woman was going to realign her priorities and while she would always write both in this BLOGDOM and outside it: it could not…should not…be above her desire to grow in her disciplines of prayer, Bible reading, Bible study, fellowship, family devotion, and every other living, breathing commitment she was here for. The time had come for the woman to step back into the world and reconnect to the journey God had placed before her!
And so we leave you here, with a certainty that this recent downtime was indeed a time to reflect on my own priorities and while I love writing in this space, it has become a bit of an obsessive behavior and God desires more of me now and I desire to give this to God who loves me more than anyone else would or even could!
At the Lord's prompting...to be continued…