New Background

Can You Hear Me Now?

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Attitude Adjustment

I’m either maturing or becoming a bit more cynical (sometimes these two words are interchangeable). I’ve found myself becoming less and less tolerable of inconsiderate drivers and shoppers at the Big W. I find myself trying to avoid all crowds. I find myself actually contemplating the lesser of the two evils: late night shopping at the Big W with the maniacal forklift drivers, or regular day shopping with maniacal oversized cart drivers!

I would actually bet that the way people maneuver their carts is exactly the way they drive their cars. Some people stop and talk in the middle of the aisle (cart askew to block the ENTIRE aisle)…these are the same people who don’t get completely into the lane, rather ride the middle…or park next to someone they haven’t seen in 47 years to revisit each and every memory since that day (in the middle of the ROAD!) Then there are the cart drivers that side swipe, heel knock, and cause complete head-on crashes…yep I bet they drive their cars that same way. There are the people on phones, only half paying attention. There are people with children running free through the store (I’m CERTAIN they don’t buckle their kids in the car seats).

There are the lovebirds walking next to each other as they each use one hand to shop and they can’t take their eyes off one-another. These are the couples on the road where you can’t honestly tell who is driving and who is sitting in whose lap. There are the extreme-seniors who have lost or forgotten their glasses and are trying to push the cart while maintaining control of their walker. These are the same people who when driving you aren’t sure there’s anyone in the car at all, because their head is below the headrest.

I wonder sometimes if this isn’t the ultimate “test” from God and once I SUCCESSFULLY negotiate a trip to and from the Big W, encountering both traffic and PEOPLE, I will immediately pass “Go” and proceed immediately to gold-brick laden eternity. Either that or I’m facing complete mental collapse. Some non-believers might even think the ‘eternity’ thoughts are in direct correlation to the mental collapse. Thankfully I’m not among those poor, misled, antagonists.

It dawned on me Saturday as I attempted to have a shopping day that my bad behavior on the road was not completely due to all the OTHER people. It was also one of the worst cases of PMS I’ve had to date. So bad, in fact that I cussed out God. I’m talking; full-fledge complete and total tantrum level screaming and cussing at God (while I’m driving, mind you). When I was telling my husband about it on Sunday, he was a bit perplexed, though I think it keeps him on his toes to live on top of the God-box lid as I sometimes do, dancing around towards the edge to see if it’s truly a box, or more likely a sphere.

He did finally agree that God is the only one who can handle these tantrums + cussing without either running away or ‘fighting back’. God does what He always does…He listened and He loved. God didn’t shut down or cease to exist because I screamed to Him. He didn’t proclaim: “My love for you has ended!” I couldn’t serve a God who did these things.

While I believe completely, with all my heart that God has a great plan for my life; I also believe completely, that part of that destiny is this journey; the good Kim, the bad Kim, AND the ugly Kim!

I’m so thankful that when the ugly Kim rears her head and in the midst of a PMS-induced, head-spinning, green-pea spewing, sailor-mouthed level tantrum, God not only doesn’t run away, He does one of those intervention type body hold hugs that remind me I am not alone…I am never alone. Nothing I do can separate me from the love He has for me!

Well PRAISE GOD! That is MY God!

Here is my Tuesday Mantra:
“…I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from his love. Death can't, and life can't. The angels can't, and the demons can't. Our fears for today, our worries about tomorrow, and even the powers of hell can't keep God's love away. Whether we are high above the sky or in the deepest ocean, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Hebrews 8:38-39

Rest in that truth! Happy Tuesday…

P.S. If you see me on the road or in Wal-Mart this week, please feel free to ignore me out of safety for yourself!


the voice said...

Very funny, but very profound also. I also have "issues" with people and their carts, usually at Target, however. I have mastered "the look", a cold stare that could freeze you in you tracks. Sometimes I just sigh loudly, and shake my head as I finally get past them. In the end, though, I usually feel a conviction in my heart over my actions. I have tried to be more patient...but these stupid people just NEVER SEEM TO LEARN!! Oops, I feel that conviction coming again. God bless you, Ken

MommaB said...

Oh my gosh! You and I would have so much fun shopping and driving together. God could ZAP us two for one!!! I love this post and have actually printed it out to tape to my dashboard and shopping cart for future reference. At least you can blame a wee bit of your angst on PMS... I can even do that anymore since they roto rooted in October... man... I really miss using that excuse for soooo many things!!! Happy Tuesday, Kim... you are truly one of my happiest reads!!

Sally said...

Oh kim, what a wonderful post- i feel so much better about my bad tempered drivng now- and as for shopping we have a great store here that delivers so I shop on line woohoo!!!!

Shalee said...

Wonderful to know that I'm not the only one who has these fits and bouts of anger induced PMS. Not only am I thankful for my God who loves me through it, I am thankful for my mate who endures me too. I'm getting much better about finding out that something I am ticked about is PMS-induced (let's do a little calendar check, shall we?) and quickly apologizing for it. That wonderful Mr. Right always forgives me. And that is a blessing that I cherish.

kpjara said...

Ken: Somehow I can just see your "eye" at Target intimidating the craziest of shoppers! You GO! I too feel the dang conviction too!

MommaB: We'd get in SO much trouble if we drove around together feeding the fire!

Sally: NO FAIR...ordering online! I want online shopping! I'm so pouting now!

Shalee: My husband is VERY forgiving as well and he's usually pretty calender certain and not only will he NOT engage me in 'war' he ALWAYS brings me chocolate during these times of anguish! I really don't like being victim to PMS!

great2beme said...

Okay so I hate to be your sisterly conscience (sp) but let me say after not being able to go out when I was sick I am thankful for all these people at wal-mart (although I too rage at times) I am thanksful that I am able to be out among people again. That I don't have to be a hermit that I can be with all these people taht the Lord created and I can wonder what their role is i n my life that day and mine to them? Does that make sense. I hate the stress at wal-mart because of what it does to the people I am with not so much what it does to me. I am just so grateful to be OUT! Try that perspective when you are fuming maybe it will help?!

Joy M. said...

*holding nose to the smell of Kim's cinged buttocks from the lightning bolt that just missed her*


I am an extremely patient person I guess. Maybe it's just that I love the aggravated looks on the onery people at the Big W when I just smile at them and say hello in the middle of their stupidity. I especially love this at Christmas time when everyone is in an especially foul mood! hahaha :-D "Merry Christmas!" I say in my cheeriest voice. I love the reactions. Most of them are good. I have more fun with that.

Chaos-Jamie said...

So yesterday at Sam's this lady is walking towards me and turns to her husband and said, "See! I told you! They are just RUDE over here!"

I'm still trying to figure out what she meant by "over here." I thought I was in a pretty nice part of town. Maybe that's what she meant.

But on further analysis I realized that someone had been walking towards them in the aisle (following traffic rules, just so you know) and these people were forced to move to the other side of the ailse (which, following traffic rules, would be the acceptably PC way to decide who gets the lane).

Either that, or she was annoyed because I was parked on the wrong side of the aisle, with two of my kids out of the cart, trying to decide which child got to pick the mega case of gum this month.