February 19, 2007 "Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are. Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart. Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow." Source Unknown
February 20, 2007 "Finish every day and be done with it. You have done what you could...Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be cumbered with your old nonsense. This day is all that is good and fair. It is too dear, with its hopes and invitations, to waste a moment on yesterdays."
I read these as I updated my calender of "Inspirational Quotes" and I decided to do my own 'In Other Words' because these quotes just spoke to me.
All too often I am praying 'Lord, let this day go fast!' Or in anticipation of some big event or vacation I'll pray that God would 'let that day come fast!' If I am enduring some uncomfortable or even painful event I'll pray that God would 'just get me through today!'
I struggle just keeping myself grounded in today's today! I struggle accepting that today, the everyday, common, sometimes a bit frustrating or long-lasting today would move on out and make room for hope-filled, inspiring, sun-shiny TOMORROW!
For me it's hardest when anticipating a vacation or an event long-term and struggling not to rush through the days prior to the "Big Events". There is another time when it 'hits me'. It's at my new job.
Each day at my new job has such a huge learning curve. I feel so inadequate much of the time. I feel overwhelmed and unprepared. I don't doubt that I can and WILL learn this job, I just get frustrated that I have so many questions every single day. I try to think about the many questions i have asked AND answered over my years in the workforce and sometimes that helps.
Tuesday was a hard day. It was one full of self-doubt and uncertainty. I came back to work after the long weekend, full of anticipation and such sheer joy...then as I began working on one program I'm really not comfortable with yet, the doubt set in. I felt completely "LOST" in the midst of a meeting I attended as well, not understanding over half of what they were discussing.
I could almost audibly hear the enemy telling me how stupid I was. He was telling me I didn't deserve this job and I would most certainly "mess it up".
So yesterday I flipped the calender again and here is what I found:
February 21, 2007 "God has always used ordinary people to carry out His extraordinary mission."
And I'm holding on to that promise as I face each new day, taking from yesterday only the lessons that I need for today and letting go of the emotion and the 'yucky stuff'.
Lord, be with me today as I set out to learn more. Help me not be discouraged if I don't know everything I need to know today. Help me ask the questions I have without fear. Help me accept redirection and training with a humble, willing heart. Help me be helpful to others and patient and kind as I interact with others. Help me remember this training. And Lord...use me to carry out YOUR work...every day!
Showing posts with label In Other Words. Show all posts
Showing posts with label In Other Words. Show all posts
Thursday, February 22, 2007
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Coloring Outside the Lines
"I long to worship Jesus with the heart of a child, in a state of pure and true adoration. Yet so many things of the world cloud my thoughts and pull on my heart until it's no longer just a girl in the arms of the Father"~ Darlene Schacht ~"The Mom Complex"
I’ve never been very good at “coloring”, at least according to my teachers.
“Stay in the lines, Kimberly!” I’d hear from the teacher.
“You’re coloring outside the lines again, Kim.” It would continue year after year until the passion to color and to create art almost diminished itself completely.
I tried to convince the ‘older’ more mature me that it was okay to color outside the lines. I told her it was okay to use every inch of space on my paper and fill it all with whatever color she fancied.
The ‘older’ more mature me didn’t buy into it. She just put the crayons away and said she didn’t like to color. When others wanted to color she would convince them to go outside and ride bikes or she’d just doodle with a pencil where the ability to stay inside lines wasn’t as important.
Eventually the desire to color went away.
One day the girl, now a woman, realized she had forgotten what the colors looked like. She forgot what they felt like as they left their imprint on the paper. She forgot the smell of the crayons as they were rubbed hard and fast against the page. She had lost her sense of color.
The woman knew that to regain her sense of color she would have to leave the security she had grown to trust. The house that surrounded her and the safety of her unnaturally white and black, two-dimensional world had actually been shadowing her all these years. She had become trapped without color and had almost forgotten to miss it.
The woman searched and searched as the seed to remember the color grew within her. She grabbed old boxes from storage and dumped them out in her quest. Finally among the last of the boxes, out onto her perfectly white-washed carpet, fell forty-eight individual, vibrant, intoxicating crayons of many colors.
The color began to fill her house. She saw them with new eyes. She saw them in all their beauty. She cried tears of yellow as the sun touched her skin. She looked down to her flesh colored hands and bright red fingernails and touched her blue denim jeans. She reached out for the bright orange fruit that now called to her for refreshment. She looked beyond her window to the greens of every shade that covered every yard she could see. She saw the colors of the flowers as they danced before her.
Everything seemed new again. The colors sang and brought life back. The colors that she didn’t realize were gone had returned once again.
I’ve never been very good at “coloring”, at least according to my teachers.
“Stay in the lines, Kimberly!” I’d hear from the teacher.
“You’re coloring outside the lines again, Kim.” It would continue year after year until the passion to color and to create art almost diminished itself completely.
I tried to convince the ‘older’ more mature me that it was okay to color outside the lines. I told her it was okay to use every inch of space on my paper and fill it all with whatever color she fancied.
The ‘older’ more mature me didn’t buy into it. She just put the crayons away and said she didn’t like to color. When others wanted to color she would convince them to go outside and ride bikes or she’d just doodle with a pencil where the ability to stay inside lines wasn’t as important.
Eventually the desire to color went away.
One day the girl, now a woman, realized she had forgotten what the colors looked like. She forgot what they felt like as they left their imprint on the paper. She forgot the smell of the crayons as they were rubbed hard and fast against the page. She had lost her sense of color.
The woman knew that to regain her sense of color she would have to leave the security she had grown to trust. The house that surrounded her and the safety of her unnaturally white and black, two-dimensional world had actually been shadowing her all these years. She had become trapped without color and had almost forgotten to miss it.
The woman searched and searched as the seed to remember the color grew within her. She grabbed old boxes from storage and dumped them out in her quest. Finally among the last of the boxes, out onto her perfectly white-washed carpet, fell forty-eight individual, vibrant, intoxicating crayons of many colors.
The color began to fill her house. She saw them with new eyes. She saw them in all their beauty. She cried tears of yellow as the sun touched her skin. She looked down to her flesh colored hands and bright red fingernails and touched her blue denim jeans. She reached out for the bright orange fruit that now called to her for refreshment. She looked beyond her window to the greens of every shade that covered every yard she could see. She saw the colors of the flowers as they danced before her.
Everything seemed new again. The colors sang and brought life back. The colors that she didn’t realize were gone had returned once again.
I thank God that everyday He reminds me to see His world through His eyes. I thank God that everyday He teaches me to be his child, not seeking to be a people-pleaser, but to be a child of worship…in living color…even as I color outside the lines.
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
In Other Words
"Satan's ultimate lie is that you are capable of being the god of your own life, and his ultimate bondage is getting you to live as though his lie is truth." ~ Neil Anderson ~
In my humble opinion, Neil Anderson is one of the best writer’s and warriors of Spiritual Warfare. He offers spiritually grounded answers to the questions that haunt many of us with regards to the war for our soul.
That said, I offer this story…
There was no forbidden tree in my life. There was no serpent tempting me to taste of the forbidden fruit. For me it was far simpler.
Satan tried to convince me that the only lord I needed in my life was myself. He tried to convince me that the only person I should answer to is myself. If I had any self-respect at all I would quit being led by the ‘magical mystery’ that God represented and I would choose to create my own destiny.
It started to work on me. I started to measure my self-worth on my ability to do things on my own. Knowledge held more power than wisdom. Personal achievement held more lure than mercy and grace. Being lord of my own life held more appeal than ‘selling out’ to the seemingly weak Jesus-Freaks.
I felt certain that success was in my next achievement. I believed that success had everything to do with who I was and what I got done in life. I struggled in my career because I couldn’t accept less than perfection.
Satan began to nudge me and tried to convince me that my weakness was my inability to take control of my life and just destroy anyone in the way…on my ascent. The sole goal was to climb to the top of the heap and take out as many competitors as I could on my climb.
The best me was the strong, overpowering, totally independent ME!
The problem with self built, self-promoting is that fall back to earth is a long, painful trip. I’ve shared about my return to Oklahoma and how God ordained this move and how God ordained the position I accepted and eventually everything in our lives.
The first few years were tough…walking humbly was not something I was accustomed to. I was all about PRIDE…and PRIDE was a good thing…until the fall.
That is when I finally realized God was reaching out to me in this time of ‘want’. Only when I fell did I realize that He was molding me and refining me…only then did the chains of bondage break and my heart broke along with them.
I’m exactly where God has me at this moment for a reason…a reason I may not know until tomorrow, or tomorrow’s tomorrow, or…well you get the picture. God’s truth is the ONLY truth that will truly set you free!
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