The hubs and I have been diligently working the "Dave Ramsey" debt payoff plan for a few years now (yep...a few YEARS). It's good to work towards this goal, but sometimes the experience is less than rewarding.
We recently tried to refinance our home at a better interest rate and everything was going along swimmingly when suddenly...stopped cold by the lender. With the great new interest rates and SO many homes available it seems lenders are a bit less friendly about their lending. So...not only are we not refinancing but we're out earnest money. Total bummer!
I realize in the long run I'll understand the WHY'S to this minor set-back and we'll continue on our debt payoff plan...but man oh' man is it frustrating today!
I realized it's almost been a month since I've posted anything. In all honesty, I've been reading tons and just haven't made time for the posting.
On reading...my nephew (not the 12 y.o., but the 21 y.0.), who was passing through on his way to a communal farm he's going to move to outside San Francisco, loaned me a copy of Paulo Coelho's, "The Alchemist". I had never read this book and I LOVED it. It makes me want to read ALL his books. I was moved so many times by this journey and this story. If you haven't read it...DO IT! You won't regret it.
We also had a great visit with this nephew. I haven't seen him in years!
Work has also been crazy! Though things are improving from a business standpoint.
I guess that's really all for now. Just licking my wounds as I wait the 4 more weeks til we head out on vacation...and I can HARDLY wait. We haven't been on a real vacation since our honeymoon (11 years ago).
Thursday, August 06, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
Life Quotes
We put up meaningful quotes on our office dry-erase board in an effort to encourage and teach. I found this cool quote today for the board:
When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.
Henry J. Kaiser (1882 - 1967)
It dawned on me that this is really our life’s mantra:
When your LIFE speaks for itself, don’t interrupt!
After all, what is more telling than the way you live your life. Sometimes words only mislead, puff up, or sully the message that is…my life!
I like it. It reminds me of the old ‘walk the walk’ adage.
When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt.
Henry J. Kaiser (1882 - 1967)
It dawned on me that this is really our life’s mantra:
When your LIFE speaks for itself, don’t interrupt!
After all, what is more telling than the way you live your life. Sometimes words only mislead, puff up, or sully the message that is…my life!
I like it. It reminds me of the old ‘walk the walk’ adage.
Wednesday, July 08, 2009
In A Shadow
I'll admit I usually like the happy endings. As a matter of fact I'll avoid a movie if it seems like it's going to end sadly. I walk out of movies feeling completely let down when the hero or heroine dies and I wasn't expecting it. After all I go to the movies to be entertained. Life is hard enough without paying to see additional sadness.
Maybe it's supposed to make us feel better about lives...when we see characters suffer on film. I don't know. In any event, I had been waiting to see "My Sister's Keeper" until I had read that book. I bought the book and thought I'd let my niece read it first, since she is sometimes a quicker reader than I and she has the summer off, so she has plenty of reading time.
She didn't get it read and lost the book, so I went to the movie not sure what to expect (aside from the information on the trailer). I knew it was going to be sad and a tear-jerker. What I didn't realize is that it was going to hit so close to home.
What dawned on me during this movie is that having a little sister who has struggled with her health her entire life...literally...has left me feeling that my life is less important because I am healthy. The realization hit my heart like a knife.
Don't be alarmed, my realization has nothing to do with the movie's plot.
I have never been one to ask for much of anything and i don't regret this as I became fairly independent at a young age. I have been reminded that I didn't receive much because I didn't ask and that memory stings a bit in light of a sibling who did ask...and did receive.
I also realized that a sibling who is ill requires more help...but it doesn't change what's happening to everyone else. I remember birthdays and holidays overshadowed by illness. I remember parents running off to be with a sick sibling regardless of what is going on in my own life (albeit less physically challenging). It's felt at time as though she is the only one that matters.
I talked to my brother about it and he doesn't feel this way at all, so perhaps it's my own journey to self-realization I'm experiencing. Whatever it is...I hope it's worthwhile at the end because it's painful in the interim...feeling like I'm living in a shadow.
Maybe it's supposed to make us feel better about lives...when we see characters suffer on film. I don't know. In any event, I had been waiting to see "My Sister's Keeper" until I had read that book. I bought the book and thought I'd let my niece read it first, since she is sometimes a quicker reader than I and she has the summer off, so she has plenty of reading time.
She didn't get it read and lost the book, so I went to the movie not sure what to expect (aside from the information on the trailer). I knew it was going to be sad and a tear-jerker. What I didn't realize is that it was going to hit so close to home.
What dawned on me during this movie is that having a little sister who has struggled with her health her entire life...literally...has left me feeling that my life is less important because I am healthy. The realization hit my heart like a knife.
Don't be alarmed, my realization has nothing to do with the movie's plot.
I have never been one to ask for much of anything and i don't regret this as I became fairly independent at a young age. I have been reminded that I didn't receive much because I didn't ask and that memory stings a bit in light of a sibling who did ask...and did receive.
I also realized that a sibling who is ill requires more help...but it doesn't change what's happening to everyone else. I remember birthdays and holidays overshadowed by illness. I remember parents running off to be with a sick sibling regardless of what is going on in my own life (albeit less physically challenging). It's felt at time as though she is the only one that matters.
I talked to my brother about it and he doesn't feel this way at all, so perhaps it's my own journey to self-realization I'm experiencing. Whatever it is...I hope it's worthwhile at the end because it's painful in the interim...feeling like I'm living in a shadow.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
From the Desk of Methuselah
You know you work with YOUNG people when you announce that Farrah Fawcett died YOUNG at 64 years old and they reply:
“Well at 64 she was old. She lived a long life.”
“WHAT?” I said. “Sixty-Four is YOUNG. I hope to live to be in my 80’s”.
She just laughed and said: “Well, it seems old.”
She just turned 27. You think I should let her know according to her philosophy she is now basically middle aged?
In other news…Locally the news has been reporting that the recession hasn’t hit Oklahoma. I beg to differ based on this Odd-News tidbit from Yahoo:
Police: Man attacked in Okla. for bologna sandwich
OKLAHOMA CITY – A man in Oklahoma City said he was attacked for his bologna and cheese sandwich. Police say 24-year-old Roger Hamilton told them he was sitting on a bus station bench Wednesday, about to put mayonnaise on his sandwich, when another man began staring at him.
Hamilton told police that the man then punched him in the mouth and grabbed his sandwich and left.
Police said Hamilton has a swollen lip and his face was covered in blood. The police report listed the value of the sandwich at 76 cents.
Police have not found the attacker.
…and YES, I am SO happy it’s Thursday!
“Well at 64 she was old. She lived a long life.”
“WHAT?” I said. “Sixty-Four is YOUNG. I hope to live to be in my 80’s”.
She just laughed and said: “Well, it seems old.”
She just turned 27. You think I should let her know according to her philosophy she is now basically middle aged?
In other news…Locally the news has been reporting that the recession hasn’t hit Oklahoma. I beg to differ based on this Odd-News tidbit from Yahoo:
Police: Man attacked in Okla. for bologna sandwich
OKLAHOMA CITY – A man in Oklahoma City said he was attacked for his bologna and cheese sandwich. Police say 24-year-old Roger Hamilton told them he was sitting on a bus station bench Wednesday, about to put mayonnaise on his sandwich, when another man began staring at him.
Hamilton told police that the man then punched him in the mouth and grabbed his sandwich and left.
Police said Hamilton has a swollen lip and his face was covered in blood. The police report listed the value of the sandwich at 76 cents.
Police have not found the attacker.
…and YES, I am SO happy it’s Thursday!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Under the Influence
My Grandmother popped into my head today. Well that’s not exactly how it happened. I was thinking about ordering some Avon nail polish (gotta love those summer shades), and that made me think of my Grandmother…My dad’s mom. She loved Avon…I never understood why she didn’t sell it. I’ll bet she spent $200 a month on Avon…a lot of money even now…imagine how much more back in the 60’s-70’s.
My Grandma babysat at the biggest church in Augusta, Ks, but also babysat most every child within a 10 mile radius, from birth til they were in school. She was called Grandma by so many children, I finally got ‘wicked mean’ and informed some of those kids, she was MY Grandma, not theirs! In my defense, it gets old sharing your Grandma with hundreds of other children…especially under the age of 10.
The older I got the more I saw how she shared her WHOLE life (time, talent & treasure) with all these children. It was like a Hallmark commercial at Christmas with all the cards and letters she would receive from all these ‘children’, thanking her for her role in their lives. As they grew and had families of their own she would watch their children, until she became too ill to care for them.
I used to spend summers with my Grandma. We lived in Colorado, so I'd come out in early June and stay til August. My grandma taught me so much during those summers I spent with her.
She taught me how to do laundry. We would go to the local ‘fluff n’ fold’ every week to wash the laundry, then bring it home to hang on the line (there is nothing like the smell of sun dried sheets). I think I got paid like seventy-five cents a week and a lunch at Taco Tico for helping. We’d sit and talk during the wash cycles, then add the fabric softener at the right time and I’d help her load those wet clothes back into her car for the trip home.
She also taught me about the Bible. The first story she read me was about Ruth. It was her favorite book of the Bible. She’d read to me the stories or have me read them to her.
She taught me how to babysit. I’d help her babysit some Sunday’s before I got old enough to sit in the sanctuary or join the choir. She taught me how to rock and pat a baby (just so) to sleep. She taught me how to teach children with love…not fear. She taught me to value each individual child and see them as individuals. She taught me that children do not all learn or respond identically and not to expect that.
Grandma died a number of years ago. I couldn’t attend her funeral. It made it too real. I miss her every summer or when I see a grandmother rocking a baby or when I see a clothes line full of clothes…I miss her.
I’m proud that she had a hand in making me who I am today! I guess I’m to be reminded that we are under the influence of many things/people we encounter…some of them are good…and some of them are not so good!
Here's to our Grandma's, may you be under their influence!
My Grandma babysat at the biggest church in Augusta, Ks, but also babysat most every child within a 10 mile radius, from birth til they were in school. She was called Grandma by so many children, I finally got ‘wicked mean’ and informed some of those kids, she was MY Grandma, not theirs! In my defense, it gets old sharing your Grandma with hundreds of other children…especially under the age of 10.
The older I got the more I saw how she shared her WHOLE life (time, talent & treasure) with all these children. It was like a Hallmark commercial at Christmas with all the cards and letters she would receive from all these ‘children’, thanking her for her role in their lives. As they grew and had families of their own she would watch their children, until she became too ill to care for them.
I used to spend summers with my Grandma. We lived in Colorado, so I'd come out in early June and stay til August. My grandma taught me so much during those summers I spent with her.
She taught me how to do laundry. We would go to the local ‘fluff n’ fold’ every week to wash the laundry, then bring it home to hang on the line (there is nothing like the smell of sun dried sheets). I think I got paid like seventy-five cents a week and a lunch at Taco Tico for helping. We’d sit and talk during the wash cycles, then add the fabric softener at the right time and I’d help her load those wet clothes back into her car for the trip home.
She also taught me about the Bible. The first story she read me was about Ruth. It was her favorite book of the Bible. She’d read to me the stories or have me read them to her.
She taught me how to babysit. I’d help her babysit some Sunday’s before I got old enough to sit in the sanctuary or join the choir. She taught me how to rock and pat a baby (just so) to sleep. She taught me how to teach children with love…not fear. She taught me to value each individual child and see them as individuals. She taught me that children do not all learn or respond identically and not to expect that.
Grandma died a number of years ago. I couldn’t attend her funeral. It made it too real. I miss her every summer or when I see a grandmother rocking a baby or when I see a clothes line full of clothes…I miss her.
I’m proud that she had a hand in making me who I am today! I guess I’m to be reminded that we are under the influence of many things/people we encounter…some of them are good…and some of them are not so good!
Here's to our Grandma's, may you be under their influence!
Monday, June 22, 2009
Lessons from the Folding Chair for Start-Up Churches
Disclaimer: the opinions expressed in this post are obviously my own, & any names used in this post may be changed to protect the innocent.
I was chatting with the hubs yesterday about my continued disillusionment from the many churches we’ve attended. We have a fairly good church right now and I have long since come to realize there will NEVER be a PERFECT church. I refuse to believe, however; that God wouldn’t have THE church for the KPJARA family. That said, I want to share a few things with those of you who may have any influence within your churches or those of you who just need a humorous distraction for a couple of minutes.
Lesson #1: Gun-toting greeters do not make for a very welcoming experience.
Lesson #2: When the pastor needs a body guard, I do not feel safe. Surely you don’t feel you need to protect him or her from ME!
Lesson #3: When the front row is within a pastor ‘spit zone’, you may want to rethink that chair arrangement (particularly with the H1N1 pandemic).
Lesson #4: A pastor who is the greeter, lead worshipper, usher, accountant, and teacher has a control issue.
Lesson #5: Just like our mothers’ used to say: If people don’t like you, you may want to look at yourself, before pointing the finger at everyone else. (In other words: if the church isn’t growing, it’s not ME it’s probably YOU).
Lesson #6: Serving Popcorn at a service does not make it okay to have only a movie screen pastor.
Lesson #7: If over half of the congregants are yawning, you may want to move directly to the closing prayer.
Lesson #8: On Communion Sunday, please have someone pick up the little cups, since there are no holders on the folding chair backs. Oh and please stop breaking up Styrofoam cups to serve as the “body”; I don’t think it makes Jesus very happy.
Lesson #9: If you are going to do video announcements, please do a spell check prior to service…and the bulletin as well.
Lesson #10: Please perform all mike checks before service.
Lesson #11: The folding chairs do not need to touch each other, we are going to move them over a little anyway, so you might as well give us space to begin with and maybe there wouldn’t be so many empty seats between us as we vie for our personal space.
Lesson #12: Please do not compromise OR ignore the word of God to make me feel better. I have come for the truth; not a personal story, comedy show, lecture, etc.
Lesson #13: When volunteers ASK to help, don’t ignore them, and don’t try to force them into a service that isn’t their ‘gift’ (you will both regret it).
Lesson #14: Teaching is a gift, not a job.
Lesson #15: Don’t name your church on a whim. If your church is called “The Most AWESOME Church in town”, I have HIGH expectations and am let down easily. If you are the MOST AWESOME Church in town, I’ll know from my visit.
...just a few lesson from the folding chair.
I was chatting with the hubs yesterday about my continued disillusionment from the many churches we’ve attended. We have a fairly good church right now and I have long since come to realize there will NEVER be a PERFECT church. I refuse to believe, however; that God wouldn’t have THE church for the KPJARA family. That said, I want to share a few things with those of you who may have any influence within your churches or those of you who just need a humorous distraction for a couple of minutes.
Lesson #1: Gun-toting greeters do not make for a very welcoming experience.
Lesson #2: When the pastor needs a body guard, I do not feel safe. Surely you don’t feel you need to protect him or her from ME!
Lesson #3: When the front row is within a pastor ‘spit zone’, you may want to rethink that chair arrangement (particularly with the H1N1 pandemic).
Lesson #4: A pastor who is the greeter, lead worshipper, usher, accountant, and teacher has a control issue.
Lesson #5: Just like our mothers’ used to say: If people don’t like you, you may want to look at yourself, before pointing the finger at everyone else. (In other words: if the church isn’t growing, it’s not ME it’s probably YOU).
Lesson #6: Serving Popcorn at a service does not make it okay to have only a movie screen pastor.
Lesson #7: If over half of the congregants are yawning, you may want to move directly to the closing prayer.
Lesson #8: On Communion Sunday, please have someone pick up the little cups, since there are no holders on the folding chair backs. Oh and please stop breaking up Styrofoam cups to serve as the “body”; I don’t think it makes Jesus very happy.
Lesson #9: If you are going to do video announcements, please do a spell check prior to service…and the bulletin as well.
Lesson #10: Please perform all mike checks before service.
Lesson #11: The folding chairs do not need to touch each other, we are going to move them over a little anyway, so you might as well give us space to begin with and maybe there wouldn’t be so many empty seats between us as we vie for our personal space.
Lesson #12: Please do not compromise OR ignore the word of God to make me feel better. I have come for the truth; not a personal story, comedy show, lecture, etc.
Lesson #13: When volunteers ASK to help, don’t ignore them, and don’t try to force them into a service that isn’t their ‘gift’ (you will both regret it).
Lesson #14: Teaching is a gift, not a job.
Lesson #15: Don’t name your church on a whim. If your church is called “The Most AWESOME Church in town”, I have HIGH expectations and am let down easily. If you are the MOST AWESOME Church in town, I’ll know from my visit.
...just a few lesson from the folding chair.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Thankful Thursday
I know I’ve seen this out in the blogdom, and I thought I would share mine today:
1. A heart filled with Jesus
2. Sound sleep all through the night
3. Summer Rain w/out Tornadic activity or hail
4. New breakthroughs in cancer treatment for my sister
5. Friends that ‘stick’ and help keep me in line
6. A husband whose love is real and enduring
7. Fresh fruit of summer
8. A Job that does more than pay the rent
9. Air conditioning at work and home
10. A good book
And the bonus…
11. Chick-fil-A Sandwich w/extra pickles
Thank you Lord for love, life, freedom, and every other little thing you created just for us!
1. A heart filled with Jesus
2. Sound sleep all through the night
3. Summer Rain w/out Tornadic activity or hail
4. New breakthroughs in cancer treatment for my sister
5. Friends that ‘stick’ and help keep me in line
6. A husband whose love is real and enduring
7. Fresh fruit of summer
8. A Job that does more than pay the rent
9. Air conditioning at work and home
10. A good book
And the bonus…
11. Chick-fil-A Sandwich w/extra pickles
Thank you Lord for love, life, freedom, and every other little thing you created just for us!
oh and here is a cool shot of a cloud I took going out to ABQ this past weekend...
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Rough Day at the Office
I came in to work on Monday ready to get down to business after our extended weekend in Albuquerque and I had no idea what I was in for.
I was covering for another staff person who is on vacation this week and we typically get a TON of mail on Monday which has to be scanned, encoded, etc…so I’m working as quickly as I can and one of my staff people comes in the ‘cold room’ that houses these machines and is visibly shaking…and not from the temperature.
She proceeds to tell me that one of the other staff people whom I had to reprimand the previous week had told her peers that ‘she was not afraid of me and we could just go outside and handle the problem like women’. I don’t think she meant an outdoor tea party and nice conversation. She then advised another employee that she was going to slash my tires if I didn’t leave her alone.
I did speak to my supervisor about it and advised I did want HR involved and…well after a day of meetings and individual phone conferences it was decided nothing needed to be done.
Now I’m all about forgiveness, but somehow I don’t feel so good about this resolution. Basically if she says or does anything else or retaliates against the other two staff people, then HR will do something further.
My boss asked me if I was okay with that.
I informed her that “No, I was NOT okay with it, but I guess I would get okay with it, since that was the decision.”
I’m not afraid of this person, (necessarily) after all she IS a professed Christian; however, I do think it continues to send the message that the harassee has more protection than the harassed. Never fear I do not intend to be a martyr to this employer. I will do my best to continue to supervise her fairly, but I will keep my eyes open wider.
As I sit here pondering what life lesson is to come from this…I think it’s less about forgiveness and more about the reminder that God is truly the only sovereign and just ruler and while my employer may turn their head, God will ALWAYS be here to cover me.
I was covering for another staff person who is on vacation this week and we typically get a TON of mail on Monday which has to be scanned, encoded, etc…so I’m working as quickly as I can and one of my staff people comes in the ‘cold room’ that houses these machines and is visibly shaking…and not from the temperature.
She proceeds to tell me that one of the other staff people whom I had to reprimand the previous week had told her peers that ‘she was not afraid of me and we could just go outside and handle the problem like women’. I don’t think she meant an outdoor tea party and nice conversation. She then advised another employee that she was going to slash my tires if I didn’t leave her alone.
I did speak to my supervisor about it and advised I did want HR involved and…well after a day of meetings and individual phone conferences it was decided nothing needed to be done.
Now I’m all about forgiveness, but somehow I don’t feel so good about this resolution. Basically if she says or does anything else or retaliates against the other two staff people, then HR will do something further.
My boss asked me if I was okay with that.
I informed her that “No, I was NOT okay with it, but I guess I would get okay with it, since that was the decision.”
I’m not afraid of this person, (necessarily) after all she IS a professed Christian; however, I do think it continues to send the message that the harassee has more protection than the harassed. Never fear I do not intend to be a martyr to this employer. I will do my best to continue to supervise her fairly, but I will keep my eyes open wider.
As I sit here pondering what life lesson is to come from this…I think it’s less about forgiveness and more about the reminder that God is truly the only sovereign and just ruler and while my employer may turn their head, God will ALWAYS be here to cover me.
Thursday, June 04, 2009
And the Award Goes to...
This morning I heard Forbes had announced the new ‘World’s Most Influential Woman’ is no longer Oprah Winfrey and while I’m not terribly disappointed to see her dethroned her replacement leaves me stunned...and not in a good way.
Yes, it’s none other than tattoo altered, blood vial necklace wearing, husband-fetching, Angelina Jolie. I’m not a huge fan of Ang’, as a matter of fact…I’m not a fan at all. Oh sure, I’d love to have her bod. She’s got the ‘look’, but in terms of her influence on me as a woman of the world…well let’s just say that perhaps I’m not one of the women taking this poll to determine who will influence me. Yes she’s doing her part in adopting a child from every nation and I suppose she is supporting unemployed Nanny’s of the world, and she is a UN Ambassador for volunteer work…but her only influence on me is what movies NOT to see.
In all honesty, I haven’t been terribly influenced by Oprah either. I think she done some incredible things with her money and time, but I also think she rides the fence a bit and is more about pleasing the masses, than what her heart dictates.
Oh and before I forget, it only stands to reason that the most influential infant…Shiloh Jolie-Pitt. Yep, the little heir seems to have inherited that influential gene from her mom.
This week the hubs and I saw this Christian Comedian (Elijah Tindall) who is relocating to L.A. to work with the entertainment industry and help affect change in L.A. He reminded us that while we are sometimes, as Christians, frustrated with the words and actions of these STARS, we might be better off by praying for them, rather than berating them.
Okay, so my new prayer goal is Angelina Jolie…that she would live to represent and influence me as a woman…in a positive way! Oh and obviously that she would hear and receive the powerful message of the gospel.
*side note: After researching this more closely on the information-soaked Internet, it appears Jolie was actually named: Most Influential CELEBRITY. Okay, well the prayer list grows as it appears both Oprah and Madonna are close to the top as well.
Yes, it’s none other than tattoo altered, blood vial necklace wearing, husband-fetching, Angelina Jolie. I’m not a huge fan of Ang’, as a matter of fact…I’m not a fan at all. Oh sure, I’d love to have her bod. She’s got the ‘look’, but in terms of her influence on me as a woman of the world…well let’s just say that perhaps I’m not one of the women taking this poll to determine who will influence me. Yes she’s doing her part in adopting a child from every nation and I suppose she is supporting unemployed Nanny’s of the world, and she is a UN Ambassador for volunteer work…but her only influence on me is what movies NOT to see.
In all honesty, I haven’t been terribly influenced by Oprah either. I think she done some incredible things with her money and time, but I also think she rides the fence a bit and is more about pleasing the masses, than what her heart dictates.
Oh and before I forget, it only stands to reason that the most influential infant…Shiloh Jolie-Pitt. Yep, the little heir seems to have inherited that influential gene from her mom.
This week the hubs and I saw this Christian Comedian (Elijah Tindall) who is relocating to L.A. to work with the entertainment industry and help affect change in L.A. He reminded us that while we are sometimes, as Christians, frustrated with the words and actions of these STARS, we might be better off by praying for them, rather than berating them.
Okay, so my new prayer goal is Angelina Jolie…that she would live to represent and influence me as a woman…in a positive way! Oh and obviously that she would hear and receive the powerful message of the gospel.
*side note: After researching this more closely on the information-soaked Internet, it appears Jolie was actually named: Most Influential CELEBRITY. Okay, well the prayer list grows as it appears both Oprah and Madonna are close to the top as well.
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
Sticks & Stones
…will break my bones, but names will hurt forever.
There is a very quiet young woman at my work who is consistently apologizing for what she says, does, questions, etc. all day, every day. I remind her daily she does not need to apologize when she questions things or when she says things related to work. She even apologizes for her feelings. Admittedly there are times when it begins to push buttons with me and I want to remind her sharply NOT to do it…however, there is a group of older ladies at work, one in particular, who is a BULLY. She jokes with others’ about this other young lady and intentionally mocks her in front of her peers.
I feel strongly about not reprimanding others’ in front of their peers, but I am beginning to think the only way this older lady will learn is to embarrass her in front of her ‘posse’. I guess that’s sort of akin to spanking a child and saying: “we don’t hit!”
I do meet monthly with these ladies to give them ongoing evaluations and I will discuss it with her; however, my greatest concern is the long-lasting damage to this ‘target’. She rarely interacts with any of the other staff and when she does, it’s as though her opinion or thoughts are less important than theirs.
I’m not sure if it just reminds me of my past, though my temperament is such that I only took it for about 15 minutes, then I began to unleash my own ‘names’. Whatever it is it bugs me…because words really do hurt far longer and harder than any broken bones.
There is a very quiet young woman at my work who is consistently apologizing for what she says, does, questions, etc. all day, every day. I remind her daily she does not need to apologize when she questions things or when she says things related to work. She even apologizes for her feelings. Admittedly there are times when it begins to push buttons with me and I want to remind her sharply NOT to do it…however, there is a group of older ladies at work, one in particular, who is a BULLY. She jokes with others’ about this other young lady and intentionally mocks her in front of her peers.
I feel strongly about not reprimanding others’ in front of their peers, but I am beginning to think the only way this older lady will learn is to embarrass her in front of her ‘posse’. I guess that’s sort of akin to spanking a child and saying: “we don’t hit!”
I do meet monthly with these ladies to give them ongoing evaluations and I will discuss it with her; however, my greatest concern is the long-lasting damage to this ‘target’. She rarely interacts with any of the other staff and when she does, it’s as though her opinion or thoughts are less important than theirs.
I’m not sure if it just reminds me of my past, though my temperament is such that I only took it for about 15 minutes, then I began to unleash my own ‘names’. Whatever it is it bugs me…because words really do hurt far longer and harder than any broken bones.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Touchy-Touchy
I am a very tactile person. I love to touch things. I cannot go through a clothing store without TOUCHING all the fabrics everything is made of. I touch everything. I touch fruit, vegetables, artwork, glasses, flowers, sand at the beach, jewelry; just about anything I’m legally allowed to touch.
One of my friends from college used to give me such a hard time about my ‘need to touch’. I have no explanation…maybe it’s because we were always told as children “don’t touch anything” when we’d be forced to go with Mom shopping cause Dad was watching a game. It could have just been another form of rebellion…at least initially. Now I just love the ways things feel.
This could also explain my need to use my hands with artwork. I like to paint with my hands, create things with my hands. I never could get into knitting and crocheting…I think it’s because I can’t just do it with my hands. WAYYYY back in the late 70’s I used to go to a macramé group with my mother. I really enjoyed it…I think because you use your hands. Don’t scoff; macramé was very popular before it became the brunt of all hippy jokes. I would probably also enjoy basket weaving, though I’ve never given it a try.
There is this fairly new commercial, I think it’s for Kleenex or some tissue product. Anyway the woman in the commercial touches everything she walks by and says the word, “touch”. Then she gets to the product and she touches it and says, “Feel!” It’s as though she finally FEELS something.
Of course all this thought process brings me to my own experience. Perhaps part of my need for the touch stimulus is because I am an extremely feeling person. I am not really SHOWY with my feelings, but I feel thing extremely deeply.
The other thought is that we are created in God’s image and I know, based on how God created us, He LOVES TOUCH TOO!
One of my friends from college used to give me such a hard time about my ‘need to touch’. I have no explanation…maybe it’s because we were always told as children “don’t touch anything” when we’d be forced to go with Mom shopping cause Dad was watching a game. It could have just been another form of rebellion…at least initially. Now I just love the ways things feel.
This could also explain my need to use my hands with artwork. I like to paint with my hands, create things with my hands. I never could get into knitting and crocheting…I think it’s because I can’t just do it with my hands. WAYYYY back in the late 70’s I used to go to a macramé group with my mother. I really enjoyed it…I think because you use your hands. Don’t scoff; macramé was very popular before it became the brunt of all hippy jokes. I would probably also enjoy basket weaving, though I’ve never given it a try.
There is this fairly new commercial, I think it’s for Kleenex or some tissue product. Anyway the woman in the commercial touches everything she walks by and says the word, “touch”. Then she gets to the product and she touches it and says, “Feel!” It’s as though she finally FEELS something.
Of course all this thought process brings me to my own experience. Perhaps part of my need for the touch stimulus is because I am an extremely feeling person. I am not really SHOWY with my feelings, but I feel thing extremely deeply.
The other thought is that we are created in God’s image and I know, based on how God created us, He LOVES TOUCH TOO!
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Destined For the Impossible
Lately I’ve pondered my creation. I’ve been considering all that God created me for. Sometimes it can be so self-defeating it’s almost debilitating. Sometimes I can’t quite reach what I was created for and sometimes it almost feels overwhelming the things God DOES want me to do. There are times when I wonder if I’ll ever reach my potential.
The answer is a resounding…no.
I’ll never reach MY potential, and I’LL never reach God’s potential.
I was reminded of a few things this past week.
#1: There are people who will stop at nothing to keep us from achieving God’s dream in us.
#2: God pre-ordained us to the dream He placed in us.
#3: God doesn’t call us to the possible. He ONLY calls us to the IMPOSSIBLE.
I have this CD called “The Nature of God”. I wish I knew who did it. All I can tell you is it’s an Australian pastor. Here is part of what he says:
God doesn’t call you to security in what you’re doing, He only calls you into security in who He is.
The only assurance is that His great heart will sustain us.
What God has called us to is outrageous, impossible, & totally unpredictable and the only way that we will do it is because we are secure in the nature of God.
You’re perfect, you’re perfect for God. He’s going to make you perfect in his nature, stamping the image of Jesus on you. It’s going to be great. That’s what the desert is about, it’s about discovering the majesty of God.
Hosea 2:14-15: I will captivate her heart and draw her into the wilderness to speak kindly to her.
And out of that place of coming into a revelation of the nature of God, to me, God will give you a vineyard of fruitfulness. You see he knows the plan he has for you, the things he wants for you to accomplish, but first, first, I want you to see me, as I really, really am for you. As I am for you, as I am for you. I want you to know me as I am for you. Every one of us needs a revelation of the nature of God.
So I am ABSOLUTELY destined for the impossible…maybe it should be called the Him-possible!
The answer is a resounding…no.
I’ll never reach MY potential, and I’LL never reach God’s potential.
I was reminded of a few things this past week.
#1: There are people who will stop at nothing to keep us from achieving God’s dream in us.
#2: God pre-ordained us to the dream He placed in us.
#3: God doesn’t call us to the possible. He ONLY calls us to the IMPOSSIBLE.
I have this CD called “The Nature of God”. I wish I knew who did it. All I can tell you is it’s an Australian pastor. Here is part of what he says:
God doesn’t call you to security in what you’re doing, He only calls you into security in who He is.
The only assurance is that His great heart will sustain us.
What God has called us to is outrageous, impossible, & totally unpredictable and the only way that we will do it is because we are secure in the nature of God.
You’re perfect, you’re perfect for God. He’s going to make you perfect in his nature, stamping the image of Jesus on you. It’s going to be great. That’s what the desert is about, it’s about discovering the majesty of God.
Hosea 2:14-15: I will captivate her heart and draw her into the wilderness to speak kindly to her.
And out of that place of coming into a revelation of the nature of God, to me, God will give you a vineyard of fruitfulness. You see he knows the plan he has for you, the things he wants for you to accomplish, but first, first, I want you to see me, as I really, really am for you. As I am for you, as I am for you. I want you to know me as I am for you. Every one of us needs a revelation of the nature of God.
So I am ABSOLUTELY destined for the impossible…maybe it should be called the Him-possible!
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